Can we take a vote please.
When we moved into our rental apartment last summer there was this really ugly huge plastic shelf attached to the wall in the kids’ bathroom. I’ve been meaning to pull it off the wall. I even bought a scraper a few months ago. I found the scraper today and finally pried it off the wall.
But it left a bunch of marks all over the wall. So, I thought I could make the marks less noticeable with a bit of white paint from the kids washable paint. But someone had dipped the purple into the white paint so now the wall looks like this…
If this is going to be a fair vote, I should probably add that I haven’t picked up a paintbrush since I was twelve. Also, I was pretty depressed last night and this morning and I took the day off work… Also, in my head, the painting that I was going to make was very minimalist. A purple line on a white square perhaps? A very simple washed out rainbow… but as I painted, I just had to give this mural some colour.
I keep thinking about how excited the kids will be when they see it.
Now, I’m pretty sure that I failed the hypo-mania vs. normal vote. Because painting a mural on the bathroom wall is not normal for me.
Can I just rant about how much this fucking ass balls lick cunt SUCKS! I am just going along having a nice life, feeling like things are coming together, having successes at work, taking care of my kids, feeling like we may just be stable enough to buy a house… and bam! I feel like shit again and have to be absentee mom… I just need to convince myself that this will dissipate in a day or two (it better).
I know that there are lots of people who have it much worse than me but this is really not fair. I’m doing everything right. I’m eating well, exercise, taking my meds… It’s really not fair. It’s like I am always walking around with a piano suspended above my head and I’m holding the rope keeping it from falling on me but sometimes, even if I don’t let go, it just randomly slips and falls on me. splat. and now you try to go about your normal activities with a fucking piano on top of you. and then, to top it all off, i feel super guilty for dropping the piano again.
But on the sunny side, at least I channeled my crazy to make something nice for my kids 🙂